XC COTD1

These two cemetery's are in Pennsylvania an are very old. The tombstones were dated back to the 1800's an even earlier. I felt very uncomfortable walking around the cemetery because I didn't know were the coffins were and if there were still bodies under there (obviously not because it was so long ). When walking around these cemetery's my mom said the saddest ones are the children, I didn't understand what she meant until I found a tombstone that dated 1801- 1803. I was suddenly over whelmed with sadness and just wanted to hug my mother. I tried imaging what the coffin/ casket might look like under the ground so small and lifeless but I just couldn't picture it. I wanted to dig until I hit a coffin but that is disrespectful and inappropriate, plus its illegal and I am now 18.

I noticed that there were some head stones that were tall, wide, short, small, what ever the tombstone was it meant there was a lifeless casket underneath it. It was the weirdest feeling knowing hundreds of people were buried under a ground but yet after a certain amount of time the body disappears and the thought of the person slowly disappears like the words on their tombstone. I wish I had went to a more recent cemetery so I could compare recent tombstones to old tombstones (besides the obvious). It would have been the coolest thing if a ghost took over my body or I felt something brush my hand but instead I felt completely alone and everything seemed quite. There was no wind, no birds chirping, no cars driving past, nothing, just the thought that some one who once was breath was now gone and only remembered by the words on a stone. Which by the way were grey and dull, there were no flowers anywhere. the only not so dull thing was the freshly cut grass.

I am now positive that I do not want to be buried in a cemetery because after a while my tombstone will get dull and I don't want people trotting all over me. Cemetery's are scary, not because they are surrounded by dead people but because they are the most quit and lonely place I've been. Visiting the cemetery's made me appreciate the small things in life such as sound, and the hugs of my loved ones. I hate the feeling of being alone so being able to tell my family that once I die I do not want to be buried in a cemetery is a load off of my shoulders.